4/18/2026

Good morning sunshine family ! So I fell asleep while trying to edit a video I thought because I had to barely make it home with a driver whose car was clunking down the highway and the first driver that I took should’ve been able to bring me home but I had to rebook a second one and go back and wait for an hour at the hotel so that’s why I texted but I tried to get home at 1 AM. They bring me back so I had to wait until 2 AM. Thankfully there was a nice security guard at the hotel near the venue who was so friendly and kind and he understood they should’ve been able to just like put my bag that had gifts in it in there at the venue instead of making me go outside they could have put them in the office locked up during the concert and then when concert done being with the crowd leave and ask them to get my bag I worked in a box office anyways selling concert tickets when I was 17 in Chinatown in Philadelphia full-time Monday through Friday 11 AM to 5 PM and then worked in the soda bar as a barista serving starburst candies, twiddlers and sodas and bottled water and from 7 PM until 10 PM. Left at 11 PM to midnight with my brother as a manager, these people had no idea when I got there like what I had been through that day and it’s not the fault of the manager and I appreciate her if she gave my presence to you if not, then she was a phony. Like I don’t appreciate people being rude to me like as soon as I got there, I was nice to them. I waited for like 10 or 15 minutes. The lady started searching my bag. I had a gift to bring to the meet and greet so she took my bag instead you can’t bring it. You have to set it down here and leave it in the lobby like so anybody could just come in and grab my stuff and steal it if I chose to go into the concert, they literally were gonna tell me to leave my bag in a place that people can walk in without Security and just have my backpack literally it would’ve been no different than leaving it on the sidewalk in front of the building so I checked it into the hotel nearby when I went there to have some tea with some nice people I did what the manager said to check my bag and to come back she said the one lady there were three of them OK one of the ladies said you could bring that bag but you’re not allowed to bring your backpack and she pointed into my messenger bag, I said OK good so I came back with my Messenger bag and then they told me to go back. I wasn’t allowed to bring that then when I came back about 20 minutes later after checking my bag in to the hotel so that I wouldn’t have to bring that one that they said I could bring in before but then they wouldn’t let me when I came back. I got there at 9:10 PM right before your music was supposed to be playing and I was so happy there was a nice girl working at the door and she was so friendly until the lady that was the manager came back and told me to leave and I was like I have a ticket. She thought I came back to start problems. I’m like what the hell now.? and so I said, could you please explain to me the reason why you are making me leave and go out onto a dark street at night when I came here for a concert and there are people out there smoking weed on high Street they literally had balloons that had the number 420 on them trying to promote people to smoke someone who grows weed marijuana so people can get high off of a drug that is a psychotropic plant that makes people lose their intelligence quotient points and become unable to drive a car properly so while they are promoting that literally right next-door to the Portland 🎼State Theatre like they basically just might have a sign up. Maybe they should change the street name to Don’t Get High St . That wouldn’t be good, but I went to go to see if I could find a Starbucks before the concert to have some tea and then these nice people at a hotel we’re kind and I didn’t even know it was a hotel and went and went into the building next to the tour bus cause I tried to knock on the door to give a present to you since I missed you at the meet and greet, and when I went back with my present and my small bag and not my backpack and not my Messenger bag the third time I came back I didn’t yell I didn’t cuss. I didn’t say anything mean and I said OK so what is the reason why no it was so wrong like I got my hopes up and I was happy the girl that was at the door was like yeah there’s still about to play in about five minutes or something you’re banned was coming out so I hadn’t missed your concert yet so it was like the perfect timing for me to come in instead the lady started bullying me is what happened. She wouldn’t even let me ask a question. She had already made up her mind that she lost her patience with me when I didn’t even do anything except staying there for 10 or 15 minutes patiently while they looked through my bag, they looked through my stuff they had a metal detector which was fine and I had a bag full of fruit snacks, and an EpiPen journals that I could write poetry in just in case there was an emergency extra cell phone chargers, if the power went out because I had to commute by myself the gifts that I had for you I don’t even know if the lady gave them to you specifically because she told me she gave them to the tour manager and then when I asked her, I said I wanted to get them to Seph Schlueter, she said she just looked around like she didn’t confirm that she was gonna give it to them. She said she was gonna give it to the tour manager and they would give it and to whomever and I’m like OK she’s not even gonna give the gifts that I bought to give to you they were really thoughtful. I hope she did but if she didn’t, then that is so rude that lady shouldn’t even have a job there she should be let go for being so rude to me. Because I’m telling you the truth if I was that rude to her or her daughter, she would’ve raised hell. And so she had a shirt on. I don’t even know what it was about. Beowulf some like folklore from Germany about some guy that like killed a demon OK and I’m like oh great that’s awesome but I don’t fucking care. Jesus can slay demons. I don’t need Beuwolf I’m guessing she was in a coven or it was like one of those women that have the folklore coven stuff going on. So she had this big girl with her but there’s other nice lady. It was really friendly to me when I asked her a question. I mean there was like four or five nice employees and then the one lady that made me leave. they called her herself the manager, and so I am allowed to ask questions I was professional about it. I didn’t do anything violent. I could’ve cussed them. I could’ve thrown things at them. I could’ve thrown down. But they looked at me and were like threatened by me wearing a pink and white jacket. I had that said Yahweh on it with my backpack full of fruit, snack, snacks, and gift gifts for the band. They treated me like a criminal like some kind of a drug addict violent outcast. I guess felt entitled to excommunicate me from a Christian crowd when I grew up in a Baptist Church volunteering my free time cleaning my church on the weekends with my mother for free, but other girls were shopping at the mall with their daddy’s credit cards. I took a Lyft ride there when I got out and I had to shut the door on the curb. I almost fell backward because of the uneven sidewalk then when I got there, I was like not mean I was friendly and I was wanted to be there. I used to work at a concert with you for goodness sake. I know their protocol but they never really had problems like we never really had problems with people. We had a coach check where we were so I figured they probably might have one and I had a Convo and I called them in advance to ask them about it but I just thought how could they not you know have like some space within their building to accommodate two small bags for a human being if they searched it and they found nothing in it which I had no weapons they should’ve just said OK she’s harmless. Well, you know they should’ve said. Oh well we see that she’s here. She’s making an effort to show up because she wants to be at a Christian concert. I care about the people that went to your concert. I wasn’t mean to any of them and I didn’t cause any inconvenience for any of them either I was standing on the Side funny how sometimes they search peoples bags and then some people didn’t bring them and I did because I wanted to bring gifts and also the other thing is because I shouldn’t have to explain myself I just feel terrible because they made me feel terrible. I was already depressed before I got there from my dad being a smoker not your fault but he was so violent me as a child and next time I talked to him on the phone I’m telling him not to ever call me again until he quit smoking. He’s been smoking since I was five years old since before then he punched me in my head. hit me when I was six years old suffocated me when I was eight poured lighter food on me and tried to kill me and my mom when I was 12 smoke cigarettes when he pumped up at the gasoline tank I went to a heart stent surgery with him, and then he smoked in the hospital room and the nurse left even when I told him not to right after his cardiologist told him not to smoke then I had to drive home worried that if I said anything to him about smoking in the car that he would get violent and grab the wheel that’s called road rage I lived my life being bullied around by my father because he has an addiction to nicotine and then I tried to warn you that there’s there’s a dude on your tour that is not even a good person he framed his own son. He’s a famous Hollywood director. He has a different name and he’s a wolf and she’s clothing and it’s not uneasy it’s not difficult to recognize cause he’s the size of a huge buffalo. Somebody probably told you to put your phone number on your newsletter so that I would contact it and then they sent an email exclusively to me separate from your other fans so that they said that I don’t have your real number so that whatever communication I have with you, those men that are trying to rape me can see my communications how I communicate and try to trap me rape me, and control me yet again like a girl trapped in a bad nightmare. I don’t know if this is your phone number . I haven’t received one reply and I didn’t expect one because of how busy you are and I’m not demanding one. I’m just asking for some compassion and a simple honest answer because if this number isn’t yours that I am sending my personal information to you then somebody is being dishonest and if you didn’t know that they were that’s not your fault so I have a feeling that whoever I’m sending this information to from the Provident record label group is knowing that because I’m a fan of this artist and that I don’t leave my house for just anyone because I keep my apartment like Fort Knox with baseball bats by my door, ready to hit the faces in of any man that tries to come in who has raped me in the past and there’s only one of them with his accomplishment that I know of, but there’s other others creeping so if you try to come to my house, I will kill you if you are not Seph Schlueter or one of my family or friends . I wonder what person it was. It said hey Seth on your newsletter we’re gonna ask you to put a phone number and then people can contact you but they’ll communicate with us and then if we think that you should communicate with them, will let you know that’s called the CIA inter bloopers so fuck you people or the FBI or the Department Of wankers or whatever you call yourself dishonest Satanists calling yourself Christian what am I gonna do about it? I’m just gonna stay home and have some fruit snacks and stay the hell away from concerts. Cause you know what I don’t need to go put my life in jeopardy again. Also, that some dude’s car clunker car can break down or my rental car get stolen at a concert or then I show up there and they turned me away at the event even when I followed the rules after apologizing I shouldn’t have even had to. I’m allowed to go ask the people on the tour bus. I got on silverchairs tourbus when I was like 14 years old they like invited me onto their tour bus to see it when they were like I don’t know 1617 or 18 years old and you know people are entitled to do that not everybody’s gonna not go to bus but some people have audacity to do it and it’s nice to be able to make friends in real life without security guards trying to tackle you ! It’s hell out there, man it’s a nice day. The sun is shining, but I gotta go to the store and walk past the house where a man lives that raped me that can see me out of his second floor with binoculars watching me when I’m coming when I’m going and women in my village scared of him breaking their water pipes because he flooded two of the apartments and threatened to do it again I’m sure after he faked his retirement and has young men come here to do his dirty work or whatever cleaning up that making sure the boiler room is serviced and whenever something goes wrong plumbing or what not cause I won’t let him in my house, after being raped by that 67-year-old dude so you folks listen up women shouldn’t be being raped in young girls going to Christian concert shouldn’t be turned away at the door at nighttime on a place called high Street. I should’ve been in that congregation hearing the songs from the Christian artists that I respected, and they would probably agree and think the same. There is no excuse for the way the manager turned me away after an apology and after standing my ground, she even threatened to get physically violent not me. She’s the one while I’m standing there asking a few questions. I said I have a ticket, and I held it up in my hand and I said I put my two bags away and I’m here to go in to listen to music and you’re gonna make me go out onto a street it smells like weed because people are smoking it at night time and put my life in danger when I could be inside of a concert listening to music with other Christian people.? that lady should be ashamed of herself when I say she threatened me she said we’ll get the security guard we will make you leave that means force. Do you know what they do to Christians back in the day they used to grab them, they wouldn’t let them worship Jesus well look they let everybody else in there. I was more modestly dressed in some of the girls that came there with their parents. It’s one girl had a tank top on with shorts and no jacket no hoodie and her boobs were showing and I’m like seriously girl. I hope you buy something from the merch counter. If not, I have an extra shirt in my backpack. It’s brand new that I was gonna give to that headliner anyways so I was about as mad as Marshall Mathers / Eminem . But I handled myself just fine. I walked out of there said bless you all. Have a good night. Maybe they needed my blessing cause I most definitely didn’t need their rejection. You know when you’re already down and out the devil will try to do whatever he can to make it worse and so that logistically it was my fault for not actually having a car that I needed to drive there and keep my stuff in after the meet and greet and just walk in, but I have a feeling it would’ve been the same way like I would’ve done everything to tee maybe I don’t know you know maybe if I got there at 5:15 like I had planned and then you know the thing was I appreciate her taking the gifts but I had this feeling that the things I was going to give to Seth Schleuter, we’re gonna be stolen by the lady. They called herself a manager there and it’s difficult for me to know if I can even believe that that’s what she was because there’s Hollywood directors that can pay people that have like $200 million or 400 million that they are sitting on and then they can just pay a security guard two or three of them. They’ll do it for 500 bucks just you know all you have to do is carry some kind of a like for example she might’ve been somebody that didn’t work there just using discernment I’m not paranoid. I’m just speaking hypothetically so she might’ve gone in and waited for me so that she could harass me wearing whatever she wasn’t even wearing like a shirt that said Portland 🎼State Theatre on it like manager or anything like I had no idea so we used to wear shirts that said TROC Crew Fuck You , not very nice, but that’s what our shirt said on the back of them when we worked at the Concert Venue that was the same kind as Portland 🎼State Theatre in Philadelphia ! Some people will wear a shirt that says EVENT STAFF so the lady just comes up to the side and there’s a 200 pound woman and maybe she’s like 230 pound woman and no offense to her being oversize but the other lady that was like scanning the bags she was so dumb she tried to tell me to leave my bag on the ground like I would actually do that in the entrance when people come in the building so any like person out on the street could’ve come in during the concert and grab the bag and she was trying to tell me to put it in the car. I told her I don’t have one and then I came there with a LYFT and I know this is not your problem, but I just think you should be aware of it so instead of sending it in a text, I’m gonna put it in a blog and I’m gonna share it with everyone and so let’s say that you’ve got some lady in the Concert Venue and she stand by the door and she’s like OK here she comes and she knew that I was about to be there so she walks in while the other guy is standing near the beeping the beeping machine what the hell are those things called? They’re good to have. It’s called a metal detector scanner so they had the metal detector scanner and they wouldn’t allow me to go through it because after they took my bags, they told me I’m not allowed to bring them in not because there’s anything in them that was a weapon but because they just said we are not allowed to bring those kinds of bags and backpacks so I saw this one lady with a Messenger bag the same size as mine. They let her in with no problem and they told me I couldn’t bring mine in the second time I came so the security guard was dressed like a security guard but the lady that was a manager there if she really was, she tried to tell me that she was going to give my gifts to the manager and that she did go give them to the tour manager, and I wanted to believe that she did, but then I didn’t know she was just trying to pull the wool over my eyes like maybe she just came up real fast when she saw me while everything was busy and the dude checking people in that was paid to let people go in and scan their tickets and walk through that metal detector scanner in the front entrance of that place. She just comes out to the side and started bullying me around like I explained I’m here. I wanted to be at the meet and greet early. She said well that that’s already over and I said OK I understand but they told me to come to the front door anyways and maybe they would let me and for that so I said OK I missed it no problem. Could you just please give these gifts to the people that know Seph Schlueter ? And she said OK so she left and then I think she she took the things that I had that were gifts to give them to you because I told her they were for you to have. I specifically made like a special running gift like something you can wear while you’re running when you’re at home so that you can bring your phone with you when you’re jogging that you wear and it says like Yahweh or if you wanted to go on a marathon that I thought your daughter would think was adorable because it had a unicorn on it and I put a Hebrew word on it and so without being mean to the lady, I said thank you but I did ask her discerning I said did you really give my gifts to the artist and she crossed her arms are biling like yes I did. I gave it to the tour manager and I said OK is it a man or is it a woman because I remember your manager is like a guy, but I guess for the Crowder tour maybe she thought I was trying to give a gift to the main attraction which I wasn’t there to see I went there to listen to your music and then his was I wasn’t even gonna stay for the Crowder concert because I wanted to get home before 11 PM or at the latest midnight and so I was planning on leaving after your set. I specifically wanted to go there for your concert and the other performers because I like Crowder’s music but I didn’t wanna stay late dude looks like duck Dynasty about to go shoot a gun and a freaking. I’m not trying to judge people by their appearance but seriously I was getting PTSD like vibes just looking at and worrying about ducks being murdered. People have no right shooting innocent animals like that that is so rude anyways I don’t know him from Adam. I just know that he’s a famous Christian artist that went home with like probably and then like got paid like $5000-$10,000 last night or at least $5000 for a one hour concert. OK well I got the fucking boot and I don’t like his picture either. I’m just gonna be honest he’s got his freaking feet up in your face on a freaking soundboard and a recording studio on expensive equipment his fucking feet up in your face everybody you know that in India they think it’s offensive if you try to point your feet at people’s face I’m all for relaxation and everything, but I’m not gonna take a picture of myself with my feet up on someone’s expensive sound equipment that they’re supposed to use their hands to pull the levers for the engineering ! Duck Dynasty freaking barrel wolf fucking Wolverine better get a damn pair of scissors and a freaking electric razor. What’s he trying to prove that he doesn’t have a pair of scissors and a razor? How hard-core kill a buck a Duck Dynasty he is ? No, he’s trying to sing about things that are spiritual, but I didn’t like his photo there. Let me put my feet up on this expensive engineering equipment. Maybe some of the dirt in my boots will get onto the equipment so we have to wipe it off with a disinfectant wipe? Anyways, I used to enter an at a recording studio and I used to get coffee for people every morning at the most nicest expensive recording studio in Philadelphia the fifth largest city in the nation I used to make coffee every morning for like three months and take the trash out before I left and I got paid zero to do it cause I wanted to learn ProTools. Maja I used an Alias I wasn’t even a student. I had to put on the résumé that I went to the university of the arts where I wanted to go to school for music or I put like one of the other universities like Temple university but I didn’t know how to apply for school or that work study program programs even existed then maybe I wouldn’t have had to work at a GOGO bar. In my early 20s, but yeah 21 years old working at a go-go bar until I was 28 moved home at 29 to become a school teacher worked three jobs full-time until my dad’s substance abuse and domestic violence sabotage my plans with his little sister who sold her prescription pills illegally and his heroin addict ex-girlfriend that threw a wrench in my plans so I had to migrate north or whatever I had to recalibrate and move north to figure out what the hell I’m gonna do with my midlife crisis so here I am a Christian but before I moved away from my dad’s house, I volunteered my free time. I walked up to the church on a Sunday morning while people were driving past me in their cars with their children in their Sunday Best and I had no car. And then when I got there, I loved being there so much at my church in my hometown that they asked me to volunteer to help them with the children’s program for their game leader for Wednesday night Bible study for children. For the youth program I had no experience. I was abused as a child, but I gave it my all I spent my SSI income on supplies and fun things that I bought from five below for the children to have recreation with the things that the church supplied and they were good people and I don’t think they would’ve ever turned me away from that concert or my church but that’s the thing the Portland 🎼State Theatre is not a church and so the concert didn’t happen there. it happened in a public setting where they’ve got us a street called HIG H St. which I hate the name of it. They need to change it to something like sober Street and then maybe people would get the MEMO no offense you know to people that take CBD oil for the purpose of relieving anxiety and they give it to their dogs. I’m a fan of Tucker Budzyn beautiful golden retriever, puppy with one of the best fur moms on the planet, but what I’m worried about is people who think that at 4:20 PM they can smoke weed as soon as their children get off the school bus and need help with their homework and it’s right before dinner time. What are they eating ham? Or green eggs and ham or deviled eggs you know the Bible says we aren’t even supposed to eat ham as Christians. We should actually be following the guidelines of Yahweh from Moses, but I’m pretty sure that when the lady that was at the door, turning me away, went to her house and today cooked her husband, some bacon or had some at the continental breakfast. How many of you did that today? Do they have plant based options so that they didn’t have to cut the head off of an innocent coward pig so that you could put its butt in your stomach this morning and then it comes out of your butt hole in the afternoon as diarrhea, flaming. Anyways, I’m sorry it’s not lovely, but I’m not going to honey glaze the truth here folks. Jesus would’ve flipped your tables over he would’ve been standing there with me while you guys rejected me. I was one of the freaking sheep last night that showed up. They ended up being pushed to the fucking cliff man and those bouncers had me on the precipice have fallen off of it. It’s like they almost put their hands on me when I wasn’t even being verbally violent. I was standing my ground as a Christian going, and all I did was I verbalize it that’s called speaking your truth, right I said what is the reason why you’re telling me I can’t come into the concert. It’s about to start in 10 minutes. The band that I wanted to see? And while she felt that she had the right to kick me out because I talked to someone on a tour bus I didn’t even knock on the tour bus, long enough or loud enough or to even be heard by whoever was in it because I was kind of timid and I really didn’t wanna bother the people that were in it , which is why I went into a café and had some tea and I waited and I calmed my nervous system and talk to some nice human beings that we’re working there. I ended up staying the night with and getting to know the security guard a little who said you know they should’ve just taken your bag in and like kept it at the merge counter or something until you couldn’t finish your concert and I was like he gets it but why didn’t the manager why didn’t she? So maybe she pays her loyalties to someone else maybe her pride was too freaking huge to even humble herself. I was thankful for one moment. I told her I said to her thank you if you gave my presence to the band that I was going to give to them for the meet and greet. I don’t know where I come from in my heart I like to give gifts to people OK sometimes showing up is the gift sometimes being there, but they just kicked a gift horse in the mouth. So I’m willing to forgive that lady, but I’m not going to feel very happy about going back there for a concert if she’s gonna be that way to people I think I had no problem with the girl with the ticket office answering a few questions I had I think I asked her if there was a way that she could keep my bag in the place that she was selling the ticket because I used to have the same job that she had sitting there and the thing was so loud when she was talking the microphone and I didn’t want to disturb the people in line so I had to put my hand over the little circular thing at the glass window so that the audio decibels would be lower than everybody else hearing the conversation cause I didn’t want people to know my personal business on the street. So I said thank you to her and I said well can I go give my gifts to the dudes at the tour bus? She said well we don’t encourage people to do that but I’m audacious and I became friends with a few people that way that we’re famous and so I got to meet Imogen Heap because the cello player was really nice when I was talking to her by her tour so I don’t need that kind of rude attitude they gave me last night and I wasn’t expecting that at a Christian concert which is not your fault. If you really aren’t the artist SEPH so well I’m writing to who I think is a Christian artist hoping that it’s not someone else intercepting on behalf of label that works for the FBI or CIA because of who I am because they might be what are they called a Mole for one of the bad men yeah folks it can get that way, I was contacted one time by a man pretending to be Ed Sheeran 🎶, who was not at least actually he did actually write me a letter in real life thanking me for one that I wrote to him before he married his wife who I told him I hope he has a happy life with in a letter that I gave to a nice guy who knows James Blunt, and the bandit that it was in his band named Ben so and Washington DC so I can trust people for real and it’s like they didn’t want me to communicate directly with the band because that lady when it to prevent me from being able to speak with Christian friends, that’s all there was to it. The other lady was nice. The other guy that worked there was friendly. The security guard was even nice to me for one moment until she tried to turn him on me so it was like OK. I said well you know what I’m just gonna mail my presence to him because then I don’t have to worry about them not getting and him not getting them because how do I know that you’re actually going to the way she was treating me indicated that she probably didn’t want to give my presence to the people if she did I don’t know if they ever were given to the artist then I’m writing too so this is kind of like a SOS in someway like a Scarlet letter of some kind I don’t know hold on Scarlet letter a romance is a historical novel by American author Nathaniel Hawthorne published in 1850 but the thing is I already know the artist is married, and I have congratulated them on being a beautiful couple and I wish the best for them. I am a Christian artist trying to make friendships with people to have future collaborations in the music world, cause I didn’t want to be signed with Britney Spears’s JIVE records in the past when I gave my demo CD to them. I’m listening to a christian artist right now and she’s singing about her relationship that she feels with Jesus though it’s spiritual and so she’s married has a husband. This SOS is like a Roman letter to Christ in the universe because I don’t wanna bottle my emotions up and I’m real and I’m gonna tell people things that they aren’t going to be comfortable hearing because they don’t want to either be interrupted or they don’t care or maybe they should understand you know what a day is like in my life sometimes but in my past, you know, I have volunteered my free time to help people in my church and I would’ve made an effort to try to help a girl if I had been that manager last night I would’ve let her in so I’m like writing a love letter to Christ here in an SOS like even men and women, both androgynous and spirit related to Christ to become unified and fellowship without sexual. I don’t know what the word would be promiscuous behaviors or wrongdoing and so like I didn’t want to go to a Lady Gaga concert to see her dress up like a dominatrix to beat up some babes in toyland baby doll on stage with strobe lights that would’ve given me a seizure. So I chose to go to a Christian concert after not going to a concert since 2017 for a Christian artist I’ve been to other artists like Colbie Caillat and Gone West and others that I liked locally and I will go to their concerts again, but you know I didn’t have to worry about being turned away from the other concert that I went to with my church group. I just felt like I went there by myself last night and I showed up with intentions of being a part of a group of people that are supposed to be singing to Jesus for Jesus and then had gifts to bring and they found some reason to send me away. They had a huge building that had at least 1200 to 1500 maybe even a 2000 ft.² building that they couldn’t find a place for a small backpack and a Messenger bag with gifts in it and fruit snacks and an EpiPen for a bipolar girl with PTSD to accommodate her disability and with a ticket paid in advance for a meet and greet being late because of logistics issues it just seems unfair to me what my experiences were last night and I’m pretty sure if they had done that to one of my family members or other respectable young women or men that they would feel the same way that I do . There is really no excuse for them turning me away from Christ. They weren’t turning me away from Seth Schleuter. They weren’t turning me away from Crowder and his foot in your face on top of his music equipment and they weren’t turning me away from the other artist that was performing that’s a talented Christian artist they were turning me away from Christ. You know they had me feeling depressed like I wasn’t good enough and stuff like I’m like why couldn’t they just be a little bit flexible with their rules and their policies instead they gave me a threat they gave me denial and they sent me away but everyone else had fellowship which I think is wrong so I’m gonna go repair my spirit finish editing these videos to a company what happened because you know I’m traveling through life solo but not all the time because I try to let Jesus Christ be my Co Pilot . And I know who my friends are and I know who my friends aren’t and I know that my enemy is Satan and he’s working full-time trying to make sure that other people get the wool pulled over their eyes, including Christian artists that they might be using Satan might be using other people that work at a record label. You might have 10 1520 people know 20 to 50 people working at Provident and then one of them gets paid a little bonus check on the side to do something called interloping and it might not be a check. It might just be cash that they get paid. This is a possible scenario. I’m starting enough to realize that that why would a Christian artist that has almost 1,000,000 followers have his phone number to be able to contact him when he sends out a newsletter and if he is actually going to be able to respond to all of these messages is what I’m saying because there’s no way that he could reply with the text like this one to probably out of the 200,000 people from I don’t know how many subscribe to the newsletter at least 100 to 1000 of the people were trying to contact him. That’s a lot of people that are not your family friends, your manager and the people that you were trying to stay in your close Social circles with so that you don’t spread yourself too thin and so I guess that if you have a work phone just for your fans that’s some way that you could correspond with those that you could via a text and cell phone format or being called directly, but I’ve never called directly to speak because I figured that I would just get a voicemail or I didn’t wanna interrupt to verbally demand an audience or something but I wanted to send music and I wanted to have friendships with Christians and so far I think my favorite artist are the people that I’ve kind of chosen to want to be a part of my Christian family so I have to exclude the people that are Wolf and sheep’s clothing so yeah, I’m sure I would’ve enjoyed the concert if I had stayed and I had been given permission to be in the building I don’t think I would’ve stayed for Crowder because I wanted to leave to avoid the crowd which is why I waited until they all went in. I’m always the one standing at the door at the gates waiting to let people in or open it because I’m gonna put Satan back in hell and his minions I’m like a gatekeeper I wasn’t showing up there trying to be the first in line. I was trying to be the last. Those are the kind of people that make sure everybody else are OK on the inside when somebody else comes in, it’s kind of like to look out for people. That’s just kind of the way I am and so when another situations I like to be one of the first people to welcome people and I would’ve liked to have been early. It wasn’t because I didn’t want to meet the band that I didn’t show up at the meet and greet 515 sharp. It was because there was some bad events that took place in my life that caused me to have PTSD and emotional devastation and I wasn’t expecting a phone call from my dad that threw a wrench in my emotional life before that having to write about the people that a man tried to grab me when I was walking home from the dock dogs at the L.L. Bean one night …. looks like one of the guys that is in the Polaroid photos on tour with you the big fat man it’s like looks like he ate a whole herd of buffalo from Montana or the Dakota’s on his way there and I’m like well that guy looks like Ron Reiner, who said that his son slid his throat in December on the West Coast only three weeks before Jesus’s birthday so that the spotlight doesn’t go on Jesus but goes on this man who framed his own son for murder, saying that the kid murdered him and his wife when they are still alive getting fat off of the damn hog. As a Jewish man I’m playing a Jewish card. How many times has that guy gone to the drive-through on tour with you buddy and then got a bacon cheeseburger ? Sacrilege or two of them or three of them at one time three times a day? I don’t know you can figure it out. Maybe you should start paying attention to who are on round you sometimes I’m not speaking about SEPH anymore because I’m smart enough to realize that this message isn’t probably going to him directly anymore, it’s going into the intercepting inter loopers that buffer my communication and that fire wallet so that I can’t get to Jesus Christ specifically with the fellowship of some of my friends who are Christians that are artists like SEPH and the messages that they share so I guess I’m just gonna have to go back to the big old world alone and then I won’t be able to make musical collaborations just yet I mean, I know I can trust some of my friends in Nashville, they probably know him and I’m smart enough to realize that there are people that care and these media social circles but I know that there are a few bad apples that can get away with things wolfs and sheets clothing that can spoil a whole bunch, but sometimes they only want to spoil one or two people like ruined their lives by trying to get close to the people that they love and care about so why do you think that guy went on tour with SEPHSCHLUETER cause he was trying to move next to me before I move to this town because he knew his daughter liked me the man that’s on tour with SEPH that faked his own death in Hollywood you people call me crazy tell the cows come home then you’ll just chopped their heads off and eat their butts for dinner and as a steak in your freezer, you people are Psycho, honestly why can’t you just have some pizza and be happy with some cheese and some bread? I’m not following anyone at this time really not I’m not following that many new people. I don’t even feel right you know, asking people to follow me because it might be grabbed by this dude that tries to kill me on the way home he had a truck parked at the bottom of his street the street called school street actually it was Bow Street. The guy tried to grab me when I was walking across Main Street at night no other people on the street at 10:30 PM and he knew I was by myself and then I had to walk home in the dark. He parked a truck at the bottom of the hill and he tried to grab me and he was gonna put me in his truck and so if I talk to the police about it in this town and they go knock on his door and say, did you try to grab this young lady and he says oh no I was inside my house watching the masked singer I was watching a football game. You know he’s got a WHODAK license plate tag with his ram truck with a cab over the back of it and some red blood red antique that he painted over another color that it was before like that’s not suspicious. He painted it like three times so that guy is somebody that was stalking me and he is in patriot territory and he would probably tell the police he was watching like a football game inside the house that night on that Saturday night, but it was in the summer in July so I don’t know what excuse he would have for being out on the street trying to grab me at night, but he was a bald man he was chubby. He looks exactly like Ron Reiner and him and his wife and their son that they don’t want anybody in Hollywood do you know about that live around the corner from me live happily as a trio in a household with three vehicles two Dodge rims of the three and then another car, a big, huge green tarp with a tent on the property where I was worried he probably murders animals like when he goes hunting he catches his kill and then brings them in there or it could be women I might not be the only girl that that guy has tried to grab, he had enough money to pay somebody else to try to do it for me, but then maybe he didn’t want to spend that kind of money so I just figured he would do that and the reason if he tried to kill me was because he knew that I helped his daughter in the past and he didn’t want me to tell her that he lived here because he made it look like his son or had planned to make it look like his son murdered him in Hollywood could’ve been one of the possible reasons or because he’s a psychotic man that smokes too much weed that has a mental illness from too much. MOLLY/K/ecstasy in his old Hollywood Director days when he was advocating, LGBTQ rights and no offense to them I’m all very supportive of LGBTQ friendly people and but what I’m saying is like he tried to have sexual relations, though with my ex-husband, his daughters ex boyfriend when my ex ex-husband stayed with him in Vancouver when he went by the name, Paul LOTT I don’t know what he calls himself here in Freeport. He’s calling himself DC those initials on tour with your band Seph Schleuter if anybody else looked at the side-by-side pictures and Winston deny that that is not the same fat Blue then what the hell is his son doing in jail when this man is not dead, his wife and him still live together it’s another Hollywood scandal of the most elaborate kind. All he had to do was get fake blood in a prosthetic, a fake coroner, a fake he even had to hire a lawyer that either had to lie, or didn’t know that the guy was being dishonest, or was being paid to be dishonest during a pressed release about the autopsy that I watched so they have pictures of his fake body. They could’ve taken his real body and made it look with prosthetic make up in Hollywood that he was split with his throat murdered they take photos of that shit and then they posted or they keep it for the records for the case courses that the judge has to look at and then they they put the boy in jail that’s innocent maybe because Nick was cramping that fat guy’s style because he wants to go around butt raping kids that are 40 years younger than him he was sexually assaulting my ex-husband Daniel, who he told he would kill my child if we ever had one so I think he used to worship the devil in the form of the MOLECH of marijuana and so funny how when I got there to the concert last night when I was walking into the building to the Portland State theater on the corner of HIG H Street they had they had right next to that building on the corner a glass window display with three balloons that were the numbers for the number two and the number zero 420 so they were trying to promote people getting stoned see what happens folks is people that worship the devil and they think it’s OK to sacrifice children after women have been raped by these men that smoke the weed sometimes, no one sees their murders. They get away with that stuff. There’s a book about it the Police on the cover of the book with a beat stick, turning a blind eye to the women in the back of the photo with the men wearing the devil cloaks that have fire and these two women that look like Betty Crocker type women giving children to the men that are wearing devil costume to throw them into a fire so they were men that use women that look like normal church going Betty Crocker or ladies that I suspect are the ones that became friends with the man that raped me that they were scared of being on the bad side of that flooded their apartments and snuck into mine the guy that raped me like once he gets a girl pregnant and you try to brainwash her or drugged her like they were trying to DM me. They sent this lady to my house and tried to give me Christmas candy that probably had a bunch of LSD in it so I didn’t even try it. I didn’t want to be Alice in Wonderland end up, taking whatever that candy is on the table and ends up getting your head, chopped off by the queen of hearts.

And so you’ve got the white witch of Narnia in my village, trying to give me Turkish Delight bringing homemade bags of Christmas candy on my front porch and I’m like what is this and this lady that invited me to a place called the Devil CuP Bridge in Lewiston , because the devil is trying to steal my cup of joy! Say the man that harmed me use them to tell lies because they’re scared to be on his dad side. I can tell you they’re 16 people that live here in this village 16 houses and then at least five or six of those women that are widowed or divorced know that that guy has been hiding out in this village afraid that people are gonna discover that someday and he’s got his knife that he can sneak up on school children with because he did that to me in 1986 and I threatened to hit him in the head with a battle ax if he ever comes out of his house and tries to sneak up on the school children and I called the police asking them to put a fence around our school. They haven’t put it in the budget. I was gonna go to a Townhall meeting and asked them to put one up. I contacted the people that designed the Congress building in Washington DC and also the Augusta Capitol building in Maine when I wrote to them I wrote them maybe a three or four page paragraph email asking them to please if they had it within their budget if they would do a project which is just build a white fence around our school’s children’s playground so that men can’t creep up on them and grab them and sexually assault them because the kids can get assaulted within less than five minutes if a man that is very big put his hand over a little girl’s mouth and she’s screaming in the woods. Then the other children on the school playground won’t be able to see her or hear her if the man is wearing camouflage and takes a child up concealed the child and carries it in the woods away from the school playground, and then the kid ends up getting abuse is not even knowing what happened go back traumatizing and can only cry some children. Don’t even have the ability to put words to their experiences like me. I was kind of on an autistic spectrum. I was even mute when I was in the ninth grade so I was spelling bees and I was smart and I read an essay about why people shouldn’t do drugs when I was 11 years old in front of my elementary school. I think I was 10 years old in 1990 and they asked me to read a four page essay about why I had written about why people shouldn’t do drugs in the DARE program at our school to be honest to try to encourage children not to do drugs and my school principal, a police officer from our town they gave me a certification and a teddy bear for winning in a word for writing an essay about why people shouldn’t do drugs to the kindergarten through fifth grade at my local elementary school. My mom and dad didn’t even know that I read the speech aloud at a podium in the gymnasium with a microphone in front of the whole school gymnasium and no my mom and dad were not there. It’s not that they weren’t good people. My mom and I clean the church together. we clean houses for rich people. I worked at Kings Dominion as one of my first jobs in the gains department helping children to win prizes like stuffed animal prizes, and things for just recreation purposes volunteered to help the children at my local church when I was trying to become a schoolteacher in my early 30s, and then I had to drop out of college around the age of 36 when I was trying to get my teaching degree to move to Maine to survive domestic violence from Virginia and realized that they haven’t built a fence around the school here where I live and I was harmed by somebody that climbed over the fence on my school playground in 1986 the men that are not being held accountable for their crimes that have gotten away with raping me and denied it and the women that continue to try to let him pull the wool over the town size by using them as a medium to lie, which strengthens the bonds that Satan has over their life and although they want to be Christians and they go to church and they call themselves that they still are devils advocate they put satanic looking pentagram shaped star lantern that I’ve asked them to remove in our village, so I think they are being influenced on some level by those guys that broke the water pipes to a village, threatening to flood theirs, and as a kind of a ultimatum that if they are noncompliant, then they were there the men who have the keys to the apartments in this village, tried to do damage to the women even murdering like I think he murdered like three people of the man who raped me the lady that lived here before I moved out the lady that lived in apartment 10 that they found dead on the outside of it that they were gonna give to me two years after they found her dead and I was on a waiting list to move here and then all of a sudden a young lady they said had an alcoholism problem was found dead outside of apartment 10 and then a lady was bullying me around bullying me and this village asking that man to say dumb blonde Dukes to her reached me five months later that man and that lady has been bullying me since then and I have to have boundaries so I finally put a note on my door and said do not come to my door if you do uninvited, I will call the police do not trigger my alarms. If I don’t invite you to my house and don’t come over so if I haven’t invited you to come to my house, you need to know other people that know me to contact me and ask my permission first because I will not let it does anyone keep harassing me, especially the women that have been helping this man pretend that he died so that he can get away with that behavior. I don’t think they want the children to get hurt at the women here but just look at the painting on the 1930s and 1940s MOLECH book of marijuana and you’d be the judge and psychoanalyze the art on the cover of this book:

Not Today Satan

I think I’m done with this blog. I think you probably understand what I’m trying to say if you’re smart and intelligent, I tried to say I kind of feel like I earned my stripes when I worked at a Concert Venue when I was 17 after I dropped out of high school to get my GED because I wanted to start working full-time at a music venue cause I knew music was what I wanted to do with my life. I was going to become if possible a school teacher and helped children, but I wanted to help my own and other people, but with like homeschooling and so I started working toward my degree I was focusing more on my college studies then music in 2009 when I quit working at the GOGO and my brother was managing concert venues and tour managing for EmO 🖤 bands in 🇩🇪. Brother graduated from university of Denver with a degree in philosophy and and going to try to become a public defender for people with low income to be able to help them in court cases where they are the underdog because he actually cares about people then he had to become a CDL driver after working full-time at the House Of Blues managing 400 employees unfortunately people in Hollywood glamorized Molly ecstasy , K , whatever they call it disco biscuits and then they become not as reserved or they become less inhibited and they think that that’s a good thing, but it can actually make you become promiscuous which can lead to being raped or harmed and so it’s better to stay sober and my brother had to learn that by moving to California and seeing all of the people partying there it’s like one big party there every day and some places so you always are being offered drugs everywhere you go and so especially as a concert manager, I don’t think my brother’s plan when he first moved there being sober was to try to manage the House Of Blues to have drugs in his life because he and I when we were teenagers around 17 to 21 years old didn’t drink alcohol do drugs or smoked cigarettes I didn’t even start drinking alcohol like I drink wine on special occasions for banquets when I was 22 and so mostly sober , drug free since 29 will be for life . No drugs ! Omg

I’m making a blog and I’m just gonna share it. Maybe you can read it one day but I hope you have a nice day and enjoy the beautiful weather in your concert. I guess you might be going to Providence or Boston southbound and for the rest of your tour I hope you have a really wonderful happy year and meet a lot of nice people. It would’ve been wonderful to meet you if you really are the artist. Seph Schlueter : the name of this song You are More , just song by Tenth Avenue North it like always really hit a place in my heart like it struck a cord with me that resonated because I used to be a go guard answer I used to be in OutKast. I still kind of am an OutKast but more so as a Christian so it’s like I know they’re good people and I know that the majority of people that were there at the concert were good the lady letting Satan influence her. I guess I don’t know why she was so against me being able to bring in a bag when I didn’t even have it though, and I complied with her telling me I shouldn’t. She’s just chose to choose to not let me in with all these people there I mean, I don’t know what she was worried about like she was the one threatening physical violence if I didn’t leave, but I never once became verbally violent I my body language. I stood my ground. I wasn’t shaking or yelling at anyone I wasn’t fidgeting. I was giving her direct eye contact, speaking, assertively, and articulately, and if I had a stroke and one day, I couldn’t even speak. It’s stuff like that. It just will probably go back when I’m looking through the you know when I go to God in heaven, and I look back down on that I think man those people turned me away from my Christian brothers and sisters for what reason? For trying to give a gift at a tour bus dude I could only hope that someone would be so nice to try to do something like that. Give me a gift, but they turned me away and so I have to still love myself so I am having to be more than those things that happened last night. I have to be more than the sadness of those events like this song by Tenth Avenue North like You are More Than the Sum of your past mistakes .

Tru Dat !

So I have to learn from last night, not getting there early on time for finding out if the rental car had to deposit I waited until the last minute maybe because I was sidetracked because my spirit was overwhelmed by a man trying to grab me on the way home from an event in town, where I went to go see some dogs and become friendly acquaintances with some of the Town people that I didn’t know when I moved here. I didn’t really know anyone I still don’t even barely know anyone and when I was when I was walking home one night some guy just thought he could body snatch me. Do you know what it’s like to always be grabbed when you’re a girl I’m not a body. I have a female body that a guy almost grabbed me that’s like two times a size or three times my side now he’s four times my size and the red truck he had parked next to the dumpster illegally at the bottom of the hill that I was walking toward is where he was gonna put me and drive me back somewhere, but he wasn’t gonna drive me to my mom’s house. I know that. He wasn’t gonna drive to my uncles and get a crossbow and spilled with lead cause he taught every one of his family members had to shoot a gun and get a crossbow you come onto their acreage. You’ll be dead, leaving in a damn pine box if you’re lucky, but you won’t cause you’ll probably burn you down for even attempting to do anything harmful to one of them they put the armor of God and protect themselves from the WILES the devil, but I don’t walk around with guns and bows and arrows because of being bipolar I’m not allowed to have a gun, but I have other people that protect me that have them and I have a baseball bat that I will use to defend myself. I guess next time I go to CVS and see some dude named Texas is Pete there he decides to try to put me in his truck or something or this other dude down the bottom of the hill trying to grab me to put me in a truck that’s covered with tree branches that he broke off and put on the hood of his truck. I should’ve taken a picture that would’ve been this smart thing to do the reason I didn’t was cause I wanted to get the hell away from that truck as fast as possible, but I noticed it was parked 50 feet from a cutlery store next to railroad tracks and dark park that I had to run through to get to a safe hotel to ask for a ride home from someone that was checking into the hotel so that’s just when I went to a previous event in town and so that the man that did that to me is alive and he has a wife and a son and a different name reason I haven’t really felt comfortable with calling the police and going forth with legal action as of yet is because he has enough money to pay for the entire police force in our town like he could pay the salaries of 10 police officers at 50 grand and that’s $1 million for one year if he’s been here for two decades then that’s only $20 million out of his 400 million or half 1 billion and when you only have one bad police officer that plants evidence or that tries to turn a blind eye to a girl being stolen a rapture murdered even stuff like that is the reason why NWA makes songs fuck the Police not that I’m saying that we should be adversarial towards ones that we know are actually really good truly good human beings that wouldn’t accept that kind of money bribery to try to murder innocent people that are not doing anything to harm others . Folks, I’m innocent in a situation. I have nothing to gain from this. I have so much more to lose by the way I’m not famous. I probably never will be to the way that you know people like Taylor Swift or I was thinking last night no offense to the young lady I like about 80% of her music, but I was thinking about her album cover this morning. OK she’s got her her snake era on and then her one album holding a lighter up to her face while the next is a tortured poet album wearing her period panties looking like she’s in pain on a recliner chair and I’m like OK really why don’t you put a cardigan on and cover up we’re looking at your pelvic area girlfriend. Do you need a Tylenol? Or am advil or a Midol maybe we could ask Cassandra oh that’s right she’s dead because she knew things about things and other people when she tried to tell them in town they murdered her. Maybe they’ll believe me when I’m gone anyhow folks you know that’s one of the songs that she put in her album Taylor is very talented songwriter. I actually am a fan of her. I’m just not a fan of her Satanic music video look what you made me do. I am not a fan of snakes and I’m also not a fan of lighters & armory , those things go hand-in-hand with Satan worship so as a Christian, I have to say OK maybe God use me in the past to help the children in my church in 2017 because they needed a girl in her generation X to be a role model for the girls that were 11 or 12 becoming teenagers at my church that needed a little bit of support and guidance that they don’t have to dress up like a dominatrix to be accepted by their boyfriend. They don’t have to have a pet snake that it’s good to want to know all Jesus and it’s good to be modest and so I’m gonna continue being who I am an OutKast, the girl that people steals music videos idea, after idea from other people become famous from them until I can actually be known as the girl that stayed true to herself until the end and when nobody else was listening, maybe a few people were I can tell you there are a Few Good men, but I can’t say that Ron Reiner is one of them . Maybe when he’s sober he needs to get his priorities straight and quit trying to harm me seriously . I think he used his daughter like well not user but he used me being here as like bait to try to get his daughter to one day. Try to be close to him obviously because he has I think three sons and one daughter cause he has the one in Hollywood Nick, but there’s another Nick framed probably because I imagine he had sexual misconduct or some kind of abuse toward the kid where there was a motivation for him to frame his own son to make him look violent because maybe he was worried that his son would kill him someday for doing something he shouldn’t like as a parent to his son because sometimes with Hollywood, he didn’t want people at Hollywood knowing that he had a sentence or passed being amazing probably secretly because that’s what he was doing in Vancouver. My ex-husband told me that he had a bunch of like pamphlets or something, and that doesn’t mean that all Freemasons are bad because there are people that are good who are Freemason but he in particular Paul LOTTREINER is not a good wine because he was deceptive to people in Hollywood his own life and then he tried to make it look like he died and Page so No I can say that so the actors and people that were in his films are good people. I’m not gonna blame an entire generation of actors and actresses in my generation that he was a director for in their movies, but he tried to grab me around the waist just like they took the girl in the Princess bride movie. What is his obsession so why did he move here knowing that his daughter maybe he wanted to get close to her but she didn’t like him from reading Pennsylvania because when she met him in person and found out three months later that my husband tried to have to get away from the dude because he threatened to kill my child, and the man said that he would have killed my child. I actually talk to Ron on the phone when his name was Paul and I said to him I don’t know who you think you are king Herod who murdered the first born in Israel . But you are not going to be killing my child if I ever have them, I won’t let you do that and I will call the police and the FBI so just let Daniel out of your house because he doesn’t belong there. (The guy was keeping him there. In a remote countryside in British Columbia Vancouver outside of that city, where the dude was growing weed somewhere.) so he was probably worshiping MOLECH called himself Jewish. I’m not antisemitic either. I actually dated a Jewish guy when I was was 23 he was 43 and we got along really nicely and would it probably been a very wholesome relationship if I had been Jewish, but I was happy that he met someone who was that he could have a family with her and then I still studied with his uncle that was Jewish biblical biblical archaeology, and went to ancient civilization seminars learning from his uncle in Chicago Dallas in Philadelphia, I have flown to major cities. I have learned internationally to northern Africa. I have been to Mexico. I haven’t been to Egypt. I’ve wanted to see places, but I haven’t been before I wanted to be an archaeologist and so I studied ancient civilizations on my own I wanted to go to Israel I wanted to see the holy lands. I wanted to take a tour of you know places like Peru and I went to know the ruins of the MAYAN temples by myself when I was 23 I invited Ron’s Reiners aka Paul Lotts daughter to go with me I was gonna go by myself and I did in 2006 and need to go to the ruins of COBA in the jungle and swim with dolphins and when I was 26 years old and I invited her when I was 23 to go with me to Mexico and then to the Hopi Arizona Southwest , and so I was a good friend who his daughter I taught her how to travel internationally. I helped her get a job at a gentleman’s club, though I didn’t want her to have to work in an adult entertainment profession that’s where I had to work and then I had to get out of that to try to become a school teacher to help my own future children if I had them, but that is not going to kill someday. So if he still thinks that he’s gonna grab me around the waist when I’m walking home from the DOCK dogs event at night time my angels blew my hat off my head so that when I went to pick it up in the street he couldn’t grab me and then I ran down to the bottom of the hill pass the toy store across the street to the Gingham store and that’s where I saw his truck parked. His red truck he bring it back to the village before I walked past it just in time to get into the house without looking like he tried to murder me. He had a man pick him up at the top of the hill on Main Street and I heard the sound of the car door is slam and I saw him get into a vehicle after he tried to grab me. They probably swung around the block and went and dropped his fat ass off real fast so that he could get into the truck take the tree branches off the top of it and get parked back where he does where it’s real easy to grab me when I’m walking by so if you’d put me in the back of it, no one would’ve seen it cause he keeps all of these like things in the back like maybe some of those things I suspected might’ve been some of the seven bags of clothes that I threw away and my dumpster that two men drove up in a truck and put in the back of theirs and drove off to some unknown location, and then my neighbor was wearing them that was married to this creepy guy stalking me that was smoking weed next to the dumpster that I almost got evicted from protesting him smoking in our woods cause I didn’t want him to catch our woods on fire the 71-year-old guy said that he died January 30 of 2024, but I saw him throw his stove couch out the next day with his brown Dookie sofa, cushions, and his wife crying. I am a poor widow to everyone in town. She might as well have just been walking around the black veil over her face like those women and there’s eccentric movies and as soon as everybody leaves, she’s like Cruella Deville with her tycoon husband wearing her leather jackets or her fur coats while he’s keeping a gun in one of the coat pocket of them and they’re going around town getting ham. She’s cooking steaks up with a freezer full of them from Clifton meat market the guy that raped me and put in Texas Pete hot sauce on it. Some guy that I’m scared might try to rape me. Cause what the hell is Pepper belly doing all the way in Maine from Texas it’s a 2123 mile distance from here to there and I’m not sure exactly where he live so it’s funny that they gave me that number and so when I googled it or asked my Alexa anyways I went on my birthday on March 12 to the CVS Pharmacy. I think I was going there to buy some orange juice because I needed vitamin C and I went to go pay my phone bill a few days late and when I arrived, he was in there 5 feet away from me acting like he didn’t know me after November. I’ve never had physical contact with him. I’ve never had verbal communication with him other than the text that I sent on his TikTok page asking him to please never come near me. I never thought he would come all the way to Maine then I realized oh my God he’s actually my neighbor’s son and he lets her drive a Subaru around this 84-year-old lady or something and then he keeps it, parked in a house that he and another man live in, but not just any man a man that has his own meat market in a town named after him they both slaughter animals for money probably don’t report it because they have like hired people from Mexico to work in their stores like immigrant workers that are paid under the table and then he probably has his business in a different name to make it not look like he was just some full-time maintenance guy in our hometown. He has the keys to all the apartments the man that is driving the Subaru that belongs to Pete that raped me and they said he retired January 23 what’s he retiring from raping women cause that’s all he ever did to me he came here two times in my life since I moved to me and raped me I’ve been celibate for 16 years and out of those he raped me two times in less than one year and that guy deserves to die because of that I’m sorry folks, but any man that does that deliberately to a girl on her cousin’s wedding night and climbs in through a window at him hotel in the summertime should be castrated and he should be made to lick his penis and drink his own ball sack in a blender disgusting right, but it’s not as disgusting as being raped by him and it’s victory for those that don’t want to ever have to be forced to have a child from that man that can populate a whole entire town of Lewiston DEMONS those people need to change their name to the Lewiston lions because Jesus says that you know you have to be as bold as a lion and that you should speak the truth to each other I think when Jesus tried to tell us, we need to forgive people. He meant those people that deserve to forgiveness. Those people that are righteous. The wicked are the ones that need to be punished, they are the ones that are gonna be thrown into the gates of hell they can’t live on earth when the lion is with the lamb and that day is coming, that day is at hand, and God is here with the Christians that are shining even when that lady turned me away from that Concert Venue I knew that my righteousness is with God and that’s why I didn’t custody her. I said, bless have a blessed evening, and I walked away from her cause I was in about to let her and the other man grabbed me and pushed me out of that building like I was some kind of a demon that deserve that kind of abuse. There is no reason for that one time folks I was in a hospital and I was taking off the street from my mother suddenly by two men that grabbed me and they put me in handcuffs and threw me in the back of an ambulance. I was driven to a mental hospital and the next morning my mom came thank God, but she arrived around 1 to 2 PM in the afternoon and it was like breakfast so she came like right after lunchtime and they didn’t give me breakfast so I was hungry. They put me in a room that was called like I guess a padded room where they thought you were gonna go bonkers cause I put a toga on I needed modest clothing, so I put on a toga out of my bedsheet and I had a silk oriental jacket that you wear to celebrate the Chinese new year in February that I bought in Chinatown and it was pink and it was the gold on the inside and it was reversible. I was holding my granddad’s Bible in my hand because I just happen to have it in my purse when the police grab me off the street and so that’s the one that he gave me that he read seven times a year and it had highlights and maps on it so I had a piece of the page of the map in my hand asking in the morning if they could please contact my psychiatrist who I had not met yet I’ve been there for less than 24 hours. I fell asleep on the hospital bed. They put me in a room for like three hours and they wouldn’t let me talk to anyone and they only gave me like a little bit of water to drink and so I felt like I was being interrogated. I mean, it reminded me of when they put Paul in jail the disciples and he had to write to Timothy, who was also in jail and the land of Greece the Christians that were closest to Jesus that were being persecuted so I was like what is going on. I was waiting for this lady that was on a phone behind a desk in the hospital on the unit at the founders unit at university of Pennsylvania. It’s a good college and or university and so like I hear the sounds of footsteps running down a long corridor a hallway and then I saw three people running towards me. I thought they were going to go to someone else cause I wasn’t doing anything to harmony when I was holding my granddad’s Bible and I said to the lady, I said when you get off the phone, could you call my psychiatrist to ask him what it is this pill is that this lady was trying to get me to swallow because the nurse came up to me. I didn’t know her. She wanted me to swallow this foamy pill that was yellow that looks like an ear plug that you put in your ear. There’s orange foamy earplugs. It was like that size, but it was yellow and I think they make a drug out of that so it didn’t look like a real psychiatric pill and so I said I’m not gonna take that unless I know what the name of it is and I can talk to my psychiatrist first cause I haven’t had a chance yet to meet with them after being there and taken in an ambulance off the street away from my mother. Why did they pull me off the street cause I went to go get in a car with my mom, but I got out for a moment and told her we need to drive around the block to get my cat to park and I was trying to show her that we needed to drive around so I use my hand to make emotion and I add your cheek slightly. It was cold outside frozen cause I had to sleep in a cardboard box night before cause someone snuck in through my apartment window, and a man was chasing me down the street that day with a brown hood on and a cloak looking like out of the Lord of the rings with a knife, he parted the two African-American couples in front of me they stopped holding their hands, and the man ran in between them like Moses, parting the red Sea and I had to go into a thrift stop store to hide from him in a thrift shop consignment store until he was gone, and then my mom came that evening and I was emotionally, PTSD, devastated, traumatized and nearly frozen and frostbite because I didn’t feel safe staying in my apartment until they put a new lock on my window because someone broke into it the night before. I’m pretty sure it was a man with that knife and the cloak and then when I went to the police station earlier or on that same day to try to talk to them about the man that ran toward me with a cloak on 10th and south just happen to be the same bald head, fat chubby, white skinhead, looking older man that went into my neighbor Cruella devilles apartment the day he pretended he died January 30 of 2024 the man that was smoking near the dumpster that took my bags of clothes out of it that I’ve seen I think a couple of those bags in the back of that man’s red truck parked at 22 south and if he put me in the back of that truck with some of them clothes if I was dead or alive, no one would know it. Maybe he was gonna drive me to be in a hostage situation or a man was gonna rape me probably instead of killing me they would’ve raped me and then made me had a child that they would’ve sacrifice to the devil because that’s what they do and that stupid secret society I’m guessing eyes wide shut that film that it’s horrible that came out in 1998 the guy that filmed it is still alive.

They said he died if he died then what’s he doing dating a girl in NYC and repairing a vintage BMW motorcycle instead of you know being dead he’s actually a 90-year-old old man dating us like 55-year-old woman that lives in Manhattan. I’ve seen photos of them and so Hollywood is full of conspiracies lies and scandal and so when you can’t trust your neighbor that they are a wolf in sheep’s clothing and you start using discernment and you know that there is something in the Bible that tells us that we will be able to know who our enemy is in that God says Satan tries to do everything that he can to deceive those around us into believing that we are the one that fought not Satan and then Satan doesn’t take the blame but the people that are his you know followers are the ones that are infiltrating my life and because I am a Christian and they are trying to make money off of the bad things like those music videos that have snakes in them or too much sexual appeal or girls not being modest enough for men like Benson boondocks like trying to encourage guys not to have a shirt on a mustache and a freaking jean jacket on makes me feel like he’s what is he gonna do like of course he’s not a bad person. He’s just a young man that is being used to make millions of dollars off of girls that can’t control their own desire to be with him and I have no desire to be with him. I have no desire. I’m like go back to your mom’s basement and go work out and put some clothes on. would you please, Mr. Boone? What isn’t there like someone called Daniel Boone before and he had like a raccoon hat with a freaking raccoon tail like what’s he gonna do sell those at the merch counter? At the TD Bank or we’re gonna have a bunch of rednecks rocking around Boston with raccoon hat on during that concert going the red coats are coming walking with fake muskets down the freaking sidewalk next to their skin head Friends with no freaking shirts on with washboard abs and stomachs like I don’t think the police are gonna be able to contain that that night when every girl is getting drunk in town and they’re all screaming Hooten and hollering everyone here comes Benson now! You know the red coats are coming yeah well would you please give one to wear : Benson Boone so I don’t have to look at him without a shirt on anymore! Boston tea party what’s that? Do people even know about history anymore? They’re too busy watching the girls with the string bikini on every single post that she has sorry one time I went on TikTok and I like TikTok, but this one girl every single photo she must’ve had 100 photos of herself in a string bikini and de bathing suit I’m like is this the photo shoot photos of her sports illustrated Page it’s like cover up lady like this one girl from my hometown and she’s one of my cousins, I had like 6 to 8000 followers and they were mostly men. I’ve been on TikTok for I don’t know how many years oh since my cousin Kristy since I moved home I mean not TikTok I’ve been on Instagram for about. It’s one of my favorite social media cause I like love my friends on there and family and so I kept it private from 2009 until until 2020 so I went 11 years, not trying to get followers while trying to become a school teacher because I wanted to protect myself in my hometown and protect children from stalkers so while Taylor Swift stole my music video idea and 2014 and became famous was shake it off with her 1989 album. She is nine years younger than me. She’s encouraging people like you know I guess the fans of Benson are gonna marry the Swifty that have snakes we’re gonna have an army of children walking around and the generation Z with redneck raccoon hat on like in the boondocks with a raccoon tail hat with a jean jacket and no shirt with a fake musket right full as walking through Boston with their girlfriend and a miniskirt red lipstick on and a football jersey with maybe a snake instead of a scarf as an accessory.? do you think that’ll be pleasing to God I know you don’t so I can actually trust Christians if you are a Christian reading this and you’re like oh yeah this totally makes sense. You know people sober up for real get to know who your neighbors are, where your children are, who your neighbors neighbors are who your friends are who your children’s friends is neighbors parents neighbors are so that you know that when they go stay somewhere that they are gonna be safe from child predators get to know people really, and get off of pages that are sexually too explicit and band pornography in your life and your children’s life and band horror, movies and be careful because they’re men out there like the guy that lives in this town with a fake name with his wife. They’re gonna have to get the hell out of here cause that’s what it’s gonna come down to people are gonna know they are impostors but the people that live around here there’s not that many in half of them are that themselves so I guess I’m just gonna have to live in the world where people are liars and only a few people know the truth if I can manage to get their hand off of my mouth like the man that came into my house were in a ski mask it pressed his hand down over my face October 1 of 2021 the only way that I’m gonna be safe from him not raping me again is not going to court with him because he wanna admit that he raped me it’s he said she said situation and he used the lady to bully me around. That is like old enough to be my mom that trust me in unicorn legging that is not my mom. She has her own children and they aren’t very fond of her. Sometimes she has an alcoholism problems she bullies me around I had to finally put a note on my door that says do not come back to my door and if you set off my alarms again, I will call the police like the lady that came by to give me Christmas candy that I didn’t ask for the lady that invited me to the devil bridge that lives in my village. I don’t really ever want to go to a place with that kind of a name a devil cup bridge ! Devil Cup Bridge the pentagon lanterns in the midsection of our village glow in a flame at night, making it look like the feast night of the eve of St. George Knight, and Grim Reaper gonna show up to collect the rent ! Anyhow, folks, I guess I just have to keep rolling with the punches here so if you see me walking around with Everlast boxing gloves on sometimes which I won’t, but maybe I’ll just start keeping them in my backpack for when people piss me off I’ll just say oh you don’t like me. I’ll just put them on and start punching them in the face cause at least it won’t hurt my hands. You know I’ve never been a violent person, but maybe that’s the problem. I’m not saying we should be violent. I’m saying we should defend ourselves instead of being too nice to people that don’t deserve our kindness. You should not forgive people that don’t deserve it and people let Jesus and God do the forgiving if we’re supposed to forgive people that are wicked then that only enables them to continue being wicked like if you feed a snake, it’s just going to bite you. And a snake is so evil when it has no other food to eat it’ll devour its own body and it’s tail. I’m not gonna let that happen to my Christian life let a snake devour the body of Christ in my life so those people can go find someone else to torment and I’m just gonna keep on being strong because as long as I live, I’m going to follow Jesus even if that means I only have 24 followers or 25 followers on TikTok or whatever so be it it’s funny because the girl with the 8000 followers all maybe like she only posted five photos of herself but they were in lingerie of course and so if I had made photos of that when I was starting out I probably would’ve had that many followers easily but now I am like in my 40s you know I have to be a proper lady sometimes and I feel like sometimes Johnny Knoxville jackass and I just wanna throw you know exit myself from people and and become eccentric in paradoxical to prove a point like sometimes I like expressed myself like someone that has Tourette’s syndrome as a response to their idiotic stupidity or madness I can’t enlighten the whole world. I can try which I have been and I hope this world improves, but I’m pretty sure if you’re reading this you’re a smart person. I don’t like to go get back to whatever it is that you do best making music writing songs. Praying for you know the world to be a better place. If you’re a Christian or a musician or an artist or if you’re a daughter and you gotta go call your mother or your father I talk to mine and tell him we gotta do something about his smoke and have it cause that money he’s spending on them. cigarettes isn’t helping me none or him in my life or his in his life or mine, and when children are told to respect their parents in the Bible, that’s really only if your parents are worthy of that respect if they are following a Christian life, you shouldn’t really enable your parents to be abusive to you and sell drugs to people or have acts of violence. You don’t have to respect that there comes a time in your life where you have to do the right thing and you have to rebuke them and if you are smarter or wiser than one of your parents are, and you have wisdom that they don’t want to accept in their life and they are rejecting you for being wise, which isn’t fair that’s what is happening with me so I can’t speak for you, but my mother had to quit smoking because of cancer and I’m thankful she’s alive and I don’t wanna lose my dad to cancer so having missed the concert partially yesterday from the stress of almost being grabbed by a man that I was afraid I was gonna see at the meet and greet, and then, even though I was still brave enough to come there in person and possibly be there, I only wanted to be there for the last 15 minutes of the meet and greet and bring presents and then disappear and just go incognito. I didn’t want to have a lot of socialization with him being there if he was so I really probably wouldn’t even been able to talk to you because I would’ve been so many people or actually talk with the artist that I intended on sending this letter to you that became kind of like a manifesto for people needing to be brave enough to tell the truth to people without worrying about what other people think or what might happen as a result so it’s just being honest and that’s all I can do and hope that you know, people don’t feel like it’s not that I don’t care about Lady Gaga or artists that are not being good in their art, but I care about the children that are being influenced by it more than I care about those people becoming famous with their deviant art so I prefer to be not famous then, but it would be nice if I had a way to help people realize that they need to follow God and so there are a lot of good people in Hollywood and there’s even hope for people that have done wrong like this man that tried to murder me. I’m afraid to forgive him, but I don’t have to like what he almost did or what he was trying to do murder me so I have to protect myself I had to put on the armor of God and protect myself from the WI wiles of the devil, and then I will not ever be able to forgive my neighbor whose husband tried to chase me down the street with a knife climbed over a fence on a school playground with one when I was six years old, tried to murder my friends in front of me temporarily paralyze me from the neck down, went to the hospital on a stretcher at KGES. ambulance they came to the school two separate times and then I had to go in the hospital to with my mom when I was like three years old after surviving being raped in my Dad shed by two young men, my uncle that were forced at gunpoint by a man chain-smoking cigarettes while my parents had a party down the road at nighttime in 1983 / I am a survivor of childhood predator abuse a creepy Town barber that had a gun in his jacket that tried to get me to touch his private part in a motel on route one in front of his own wife when I was five years old in 1985. The statute of limitations protects him from going to jail, even though he is a child predator and his own wife is scared of telling people the truth because she knows that he keeps a gun in his leather coat pocket. And then like a Ziploc bag of Tootsie pops and Tootsie rolls and the other of the box of cracker jack sometimes in the inside coat pocket real creepy, dude and then he has a house that smells like mothballs and a whole cabinet full of Vienna sausages at any given time from there is $10 doubles haircut so he has three days a week if he has three men come to him or nine men a week he makes like $100 a week from his haircut so if he has six Customer a day three days a week or 18 customers per week that’s $200 he has in his pocket and $800 a month to actually pay his electricity e-bill his cable, his water phone some groceries and those damn Vienna sausages he has in his cabinet and his car insurance and a little bit of gasoline can go a long way when it’s only less than 4 miles down the road to a motel on Rt 1 or something like that say hope you know where your children are at night because don’t let them get in a car with a couple of trying to offer to bring them back little Caesars pizza. They might come home with a cracker jack box decal tattoo that they licked that is laced with LSD raped later the kid if they don’t fight the guy I fought him. I punched him. I kicked him. He didn’t have an easy time getting me to try to do what he was trying to get me to do. He tried to make me watch a Tootsie roll. Tootsie pop commercial to try to get me to touch his private part and lick his private part when I was a little kid and he put his penis in my eye like he missed my mouth because of his aim being poor and his penis went into my left eye. That’s when I punched him and kicked him. I jumped off the bed wearing my clothes. He didn’t takeoff and he wore his leather coat over a canvas button-down shirt. Are you guys sick ready to vomit yet?

Guy is psycho. And then his wife washed my hands. He said you are a smart little girl aren’t you? Yes, I am Mr. that’s because I’m a Christian but he put a gun up to my head and told me that if I told my mom what happened that he would kill us so I didn’t tell my mom about it for 40 years and I conveniently forgot about it, but then when I remembered it during a week of solar eclipse, I was too scared to even talk to my therapist about it for a whole year and then I realized that as I was shopping at TJ Maxx and he came down the hallway wearing his leather coat last December. He wasn’t there to use that bathroom in that hallway. He was there cause I went there to use the bathroom and he followed me and he was gonna hurt me without anyone seeing it. I was smart enough to realize that the bathroom is only 5 feet down the hall from the door that it could’ve looked like on camera longer down the hallway where it was stationed that he was going into the men’s bathroom and not the women’s bathroom, but the women’s bathroom is only less than maybe 6 feet from the men’s are about a 10 foot distance apart, so who’s to tell the difference when they don’t have a zoom lens on the camera and so it’s an old school and in that hallway or if they did, it doesn’t matter cause he probably would be able to pay the person watching it to have a blind eye so his wife doesn’t tell people what he did. I don’t expect her to. She’s kept that a secret as long as I was five, so I guess you have to be careful like I have no interest in that gun he has in his leather coat pocket. I hope it never gets in the wrong hand of people that’s why I don’t like guns I don’t even want it to own one, so I watched dancer in the dark and they framed Björk. That’s what they do. They try to get the innocent girls so I’m thinking what would be the best thing to do you know I can’t bring the dude to court. I can’t call the police either cause like half of them probably get their haircut by the guy he had 33 satanic Bibles in his room and his wife’s bedroom loft There’s worse things I know about that man. I guess I’ll go ahead and say it but yeah if you ever been to 243 barrel man me Road and Scarborough Maine called barrel man me and got a metal barrel George Dupree did he has one , funny how it’s on Black point Road, but it was a little black boy that he put inside of a metal barrel to throw in a marsh on the side of route one who is in the back of the SUV that night that he was a child predator to meet in a motel so if I’m quiet about it, maybe if I sit still and look pretty, he won’t try to murder me, but I’m not gonna sit still and look pretty. I’m pissed off and it’s stressed out as Lily Depp being stolen by NOSFERATU I ain’t got time to look pretty. I got it maybe look slightly like I used to be pretty when I was younger, but that I’ve been through so much stress lately that you can see that I’ve been having a fight demons trying to rape me, and starting to show my age, but we’re in the age of Pisces when Jesus is supposed to be coming back. I’m a Pisces and I will die probably from the stress of having to fight these men that raped me and the women that he uses in my village to try to oppress me sometimes that really do care about me and know that I’m a lovely person, but they have tried to not be on his bad side and if they’re gonna take sides with Satan cause they’re worried about him having a bad side then they don’t have their full faith in Jesus so I’m gonna keep on marching I’m gonna start walking with the friggin flag pretty do not get a horse I’ll just be like the Joan of the arc on a damn crusade .. for the Christians, but I’m not actually trying to kill anyone. I don’t like having to use a sword in a battle or carry a flag on a horse, but I do approve of people that were renegades spiritually that were doing the right things, the underdog it just becomes stressful anymore, trying to speak up for Christ and then getting the same kind of faith that he had jail excommunication ridicule, trying to be silenced so maybe that’s what a lot of people can actually relate to you. That are good people Christians are being the martyr. Dumb is something that happens because they’re bad people and bad men like the man that reached me Clifton like Pepper belly Pete aka Texas Pete if he has intentions of reading women, I can’t say it for sure what he was doing at that CVS Pharmacy on my birthday in March 2026 why he felt that he disgrace me with his presence the damn my birthday four months after he posted a video I told everybody not to eat the pigs on his webpage because he’s trying to sell hot sauce to people, and the man that reached me has his own meat market and the lady that was accomplished to them I think has brothers that have their own steakhouse so that’s the one motive that they all had in common was to not let the vegetarian girl that’s compassionate to animals have a voice B known as a girl that’s bipolar that told people that she was raped and then hide the evidence to people won’t believe her to make her look crazy so that there’s men don’t lose their customers or their loyal fan base and then that lady gets a stake full of freezers out of it and then the other women that turn a line I don’t have to worry about him flooding their water pipes while women like myself end up getting hurt by trying to protect themselves from being raped. Well, I do know I can trust some people in this town and some of my neighbors are good. I just wish all of them were good, but they’re not there’s no excuse for Buckner inviting me to a devil bridge. She said she had her camera and she wanted to go there and take pictures and I’m thinking of my dead body after those men harm me that she was trying to bring me to probably why else would she invite me to a place with that kind of an email she wasn’t inviting me there to meet Jesus so listen and folks I gotta go cause I’m too tired to write. I’ve been talking for the past hour and a half in this text to finish this blog and I need to heal my spirit. it is a sabbath and is supposed to be a day of rest so I’m just gonna lay down maybe give my mom a call. Try to get to the store without being murdered on the way. I need to grocery shop in the next few days and replenish and get the stuff that I need to have the strength to fight these demons nearby in this town this village and elsewear I’m not asking anybody else. to harm anyone I’m not asking people to help me take any kinds of legal actions against the demonic bad things. These people have done or I can just tell you that Peter shouldn’t even be coming around me when I asked him not to, and I will be kind to my neighbors and his mother. I have to like do that whole killing him with kindness thing I’m not actually killing them but like quell the anger , the guy next-door with the colostomy bag that pretended to die. He’s pretty angry that he was caught being a liar, cause he was so sneaky and dirty and disgusting. I think that used to be his nickname. One lady he said that he tried to choke her at the hospital where I was she was in subsidize housing and she had to move to a different place so that the guy wouldn’t grab her, but he knew where she lived and so I’m pretty sure it’s the same guy he showed up at the hospital when I was there what’s a guy doing and driving around town in the Nissan that they said died folks sometimes we live in are scary. It’s also a really beautiful time to be alive. So make the most of each day cause you don’t know if you’ll have one one day to the next, if you’re gonna be grabbed and put in the trunk of a freaking Dodge ram it’s not something that just happens in the silence of the lambs movie the one that made 272 million with the $19 million budget and then ask yourself this folks if that guy had a twin brother Anthony Hopkins and that’s what my Alexa guard said his name was Tiberias but then they said his name is Demetrius. The guy that wrote the screenplay for the silence of Williams. His name is DEM as in demon, but the money that they made what do they do with all that open up as cerebral palsy charity hospital to make it look like he doesn’t actually eat peoples livers in real life that he didn’t want to be in a role where he could be close to Jodie Foster he was probably stuck in and knew he could never gotten near that lady. She would’ve never ever wanted to be around him. Maybe I’m guessing, unless they tried to pay her money to be in a movie that was written for her to be in so that she had to tell people that he was a nice man in between filming so that they would think he was a nice guy after I was telling people that a guy that looks like him was wearing a female blonde scout glued to it his forehead that pretended to be a social worker at a hospital with a duffel bag who arrived at 5 PM and what kind of a social worker arrives in a hospital building on a psychiatric unit at 5 PM without a real computer in the computer bag that had a zipper open that didn’t have a computer in it, and he takes it old school, clipboard out of it, asking me questions about my life, and when he started asking me things like who my family are and where they live I’m like that has nothing to do and actually I didn’t let him know that I knew that he was who he was because if I did, I was afraid he would try to grab my jugular not to bite me so I didn’t want anybody to get hurt at the Westbrook hospital when he was there sometime on what day was that it was before 17 October so it was probably like a week before then so it’s probably like 11 October. I’m guessing it had to have been on a weekday in 2024 so it was a week before my hearing after I’ve been in the hospital for a few weeks having a nervous breakdown because there is a poisonous TASUSBACCATAc in that year I was asking the management to remove it because it’s one of the most poisonous in the kingdom and it’s a cardio toxin he can slow your heart down to a stop and then it’s poisonous and it’s right in front of my house and my stepdad came to visit with my mom. I hadn’t seen in seven years after she survived from cancer nearly getting sepsis from having that injected, TAXINERTAXANE was an extract that they got from the tree that they put inside of her PORT that caused her to nearly die from sepsis because her kidneys couldn’t filter the poison that shouldn’t have been put in her body to begin with that caused her with radiation and chemotherapy to lose all of her hair that since she stopped having that medication and quit having those treatments has grown back, I was getting a panic attack from being on the porch with my step down, so I pushed his arm down the police apologize to me last year. They knew in early spring that it was not really nice that they jammed their knee into my bag and pushed my face down and sprained my arm, causing me to go to the hospital for two months in 2024 in September on the 17th until I came home on November 5 because of pushing my stepdad’s arm down when I didn’t want to be on the porch next to him beside that poisonous tree that has substances in it that almost killed my mom and the medication that she was taking and so people that are evil also do evil landscaping they will put freaking wood chips on the side of the road next to Scottish broom invasive plant species. That’ll set those kind of trees at the top of the hill on fire around a valley. We’re 5000 people live below that don’t get to see the light of day because the smoke from the trees that were burning poison, their lungs, and they died by evil men that worshiped the devil and the form of MOLECH that grow marijuana that worship the devil and take children to sacrifice them on the lap of a bull statue by the men that build their stomachs with pigs and swine and animals that were slaughtered against the teachings of Yahweh and the kosher live so if it makes people mad that I don’t want them to eat pigs then I must be doing good because Jesus was also grabbed by people taken to across nailed to it, humiliated in public ridiculed, called the king of the Jews, nailed Nine Inch Nails into his hands and view. It was terrible and then jailed all of his friends and family murdered them after he went to heaven after his body healed from nearly dying on a cross while he was trying to carry that cross to be crucified on they beat him, put a crown of thorns on his head that was bleeding and they used to think it was for him from a Hollywood tree that he was nailed to that tree and the evil people from Rome the Bible says Armageddon 666 that the antichrist will come from that place so why is Anthony Hawkins so keen to try to wear a toga with a golden laurel wreath and ask everybody in a movie who wants to die next so that he can eat their liver with a nice Chianti ? Anyhow, so don’t be fooled by your neighbor who might be a wolf in sheep’s clothing and including Anthony Hopkins he was a good guy and some of his films, but is he gonna choose to behave and have a good path what about those two pacific air liners what are they doing over at Brunswick Landing without windows and then it looks like they were bombed isn’t he from Hawaii so if he was at the hospital visiting me, he had to get over from Hawaii somehow right I don’t know. I know he wasn’t in a canoe out in the boat. He definitely wasn’t Greta in the middle of a raft. Making his way from the pacific to the East Coast last October 17 for that hearing where he dressed up as a lady that was blonde with a scalp on her head, trying to represent me before a judge without my permission I had to pretend like I didn’t know who he was so that he would leave that building without holding me hostage and killing the innocent people that worked there. When I was a mental patient, they wanted me to take a different medication. The kind I was taking was fine before I was just having a panic attack to some foliage tree that could’ve stopped my heart on my front porch that shouldn’t be there that the evil people that do landscaping for Satan the guy that reached me as a landscaper, isn’t that interesting also that I saw the man that they said died that lived next-door to me show up at the hospital when I was looking out the window and I called the police and said build a fence around our school or he’s gonna take the children. Are we so brainwashed that we all think that it’s always good in the hood? like it’s not it’s not folks it’s not ghetto fabulous like so he showed up at the hospital trying to look like a woman other people that were patient. They noticed how weird that he was. He didn’t look like a woman. He looked like a freaking demon trying to pretend like he was a woman my own cousin didn’t even know it the judge that was telling me that I seem like a nice girl on the Zoom call on the 17th hearing that he represented to me, I said I don’t really want you to represent me. I said to him when he came to visit me in my hospital room, pretending he was a woman, and I was like I wonder if I stab him in the eye with my fork if that’ll help this situation then I realize it wouldn’t because he could probably still with that fork in his eye, take it out and try to harm other people with it and that he might have a gun in his bag so I was like I don’t want anything bad to happen to the people at the hospital so I didn’t even say anything about it the whole time I was there except to the other staff workers we talked about it I mean, not staff workers I mean that the patients we talked to each other and we’re like that’s freaking messed up that dude was creepy and so we even had to keep it a secret among our ourselves to not let the staff workers know because that would’ve gotten back to him directly and then he might have done something to wear cause he in the movie actually at dinner time harmed the hospital Police that we’re bringing his dinner tray will he arrived when they were giving me mine so if an ambulance was parked outside, he would’ve just gone in the elevator and without all the police or the SWAT there he would’ve been able to escape if all he had was a gun because none of the people that worked there had one so he would’ve been able to get into an ambulance and then have something weird happened but what about those airplanes? Maybe he was planning and getting one of those real fast that are being so called recommissioned that have they probably have been repainted them since then, but it was like a pacific Hawaiian airplane that I went to go to get my wellness exam at Martin’s .2 years ago with my primary healthcare physician in the spring time and when I parked there and looked over in the field and I was like what are those two Hawaiian planes doing and why does one of them have no windows in it it looks like they’ve either been broken out or they were bombed from the inside ? They were pacific planes kind of have like a Hawaii Hawaiian 💐 🌼on , a 🌺flower on them. What were they gonna do with them so think about it they had a fire in Maui and he was living in Hawaii. Can you actually trust this man? They made $272 million from that one evil production that was horrible then he wanted to receive in a word for his outstanding performance as a psychopath cannibal that each peoples lives like I don’t need to come hard down on the judgment here from a Christian perspective, but how many more people are going to ignore the warning signs? When that guy, you know, he’s totally capable of getting away with so many more crimes than people that don’t have the kind of money that they made from those productions have and then I found out Stephen King. I’ve never met the guy, but he’s made 280 movies or books about murders and evil productions. Those things aren’t helping young children to find Jesus Christ are to follow a path that will lead them to Christ those are things that the devil makes to deceive the children of the Lord from learning about Christ and the true king of Israel, not Stephen King Jesus Christ is and so if people don’t start paying attention, our children are gonna get stolen, raped, murdered, sacrifice, and burned like those trees in California in that valley where those people died in the Pacific Palisades fires that’s why I shared a video to try to tell my friends like this is what is important right now not the next trend you need to know what’s going on in your local surroundings and make sure there aren’t people doing evil landscaping! Do the research if you see a bunch of poisonous trees outside of your bank, your office your for example, I was in Philadelphia. I lived there for 10 years on South Street and we had a tower records music store a bookstore a Jewish synagogue around the corner from my house. There was a Starbucks within five blocks of each other Johnny Rockets, a French crêperie and Moroccan restaurant a Turkish restaurant Middle Eastern Mediterranean restaurant a Japanese Chinese fusion restaurant and an Indian restaurant and an Italian diner and then there’s a Jamaican restaurant way far down the road past the Whole Foods and Arafa eye store and then another health food store like every where you went on that street there was diversity. There was a Greek restaurant there were pizza of places, brick, oven, pizza, places, and then there was a little bakery that had carrot cupcakes that I used to love to go to with my mom to get tea like in the British kind of style and English, though it closed down sadly and so I lived there for 10 years and I went for a walk often in the city every day, cause I didn’t have a car so for 10 years, I lived in the city and I took taxis everywhere and I got a zip car and a flex car and when I went to New York or to Boston, I would commute by train or I would fly on a plane and then sometimes I would rent a car or a truck for a weekend to go to a special meditation training event or I travel internationally like to England or Africa to visit my friends and Mexico to make new friends, but I am thankful for the friendships. I made my life. I just think Anthony Hopkins needs to try to behave himself. I don’t I’m not really a big fan of some of the production that he was in except for the legends of the fault that was a really intense historical film that was about Native American culture, which I am partial to you because my mother being Cherokee and so no one should ever in real life be a cannibal and nobody should think it’s funny to dress up like a woman pretending to be a woman when they are a man to get close to a young lady that that’s deceiving that’s deception so Jodie Foster had to tolerate being in that movie, even though she didn’t like what it was about and said that Hopkins is a nice guy because he was he’s very you know charming to people and he’s smart. He’s extremely intelligent, but I don’t approve of people being cannibals and I’m not sure what his real life sentiments are, but I hope that he realizes that if he’s trying to be like the antichrist that he will be destroyed, but it’s not that far from says in the book of revelations that he would be friends with the devil my neighbor with the brown cloak pretended to die folks can’t get any more devilish than that one California in Hawaii or not that far from Maine and the world is actually full of good people so we have the power to stop Armageddon spiritually to have that peace come into the Earth where the lion sleeps with the lamb and the lamb doesn’t have to be silent. It can be happy and it should be, and so Jesus was called the lamb of God so let’s welcome and back into our lives and those that reject them give them the boot in ours give them the choice : Vio Condios Go With God ! Or Vamanose .. or go away! You know that Ludacris song get out the way when Jesus said to Satan Get out of my way ! What does that mean that means not bringing snakes into your house around your children it could eat their pug. You know. Choose to be a little modest more often and try not to do drugs. Stay sober go the road less traveled. Don’t be afraid to speak your truth. Let Christians have their voice to speak their truth. Let Buddhist people have their way of life that is peaceful and nonviolent peacefully with the Hindi people that don’t slaughter cows in their culture before western influence let the western people influencing cultures to harm cows learned that they should love them. I saw a guy bring a cow through a drive-through and give him a muffin today. It was so adorable and it was one of those fluffy kind of cows, though that they make beef and steak out of it I was so happy to see it not being slaughtered. I mean I can’t even imagine the pain in the suffering that would go through what that cow goes through like you can have emotions with animals. I mean, you can allow yourself to let your you know cowboy western civilization, adopt peace, and love and kindness through nonviolence towards animals when the Lord Yahweh said we have Dominion over them, but not necessarily to need to kill them that was during Noah’s flood that that was necessary without being able to grow the food that we need for plant-based food on the land but even chickens have TALONS and they shouldn’t be eaten like turkeys cause they are not considered kosher but when he did tell Moses to not eat the flesh or blood of any living thing here I find myself again on another Sabbath preaching again. I am like not gonna really be able to even write songs or focus on music cause I don’t even have this strength from all the words that I’ve had to speak and all the energy it takes to pronounce these words, my grandmother who had a stroke and could not even barely talk that had to learn how to talk again I’m like please don’t take my words for granted you know I’m half of my life over. I don’t know how much longer I’m gonna be alive. maybe I’ll be lucky if I live another four years or three or four or five years that would be a miracle to me, but it still isn’t anything that I have control over but I have to take the best care of myself possible and thank you for reading this, but please also realize God did say Moses to not eat the flesh or blood of any living thing and that we should have the land of milk and honey people should not be eating the flesh of animals. We should be not be cannibals so you know that’s what he has done is nothing compared to the lady that kicked me out of the Concert Venue last night when I wasn’t even there to cause any harm to anyone it was just so depressing that I had to go through that and it was just like I already have low self-esteem and I have like social isolation. I forgot to communicate with my case manager, but that’s OK. She told me that I could if I wanted to so I’ll have to get back to her today and tell her I didn’t make it into the venue with Loving. Welcome by that lady that barricaded me from being at a concert that I should’ve been able to go to with flexibility on their part. I think they could’ve been a little bit more kinder than they were but I mean they were 50% kind and 50% rude and so they chose the latter of the two to take precedence so that I wouldn’t be able to actually participate. There was a void there where I would’ve been you know so my spirit, my Holy Spirit I wanted to fill my vessel with light to bring to the concert whether I didn’t wanna bring all that stuff with me, but I sometimes like, for example I saw two guys walking in to the hotel last night and one of them had a backpack on messenger bag and he got his cell phone in his hand. Sometimes you know when I went there, I had a backpack a Messenger bag and two other small little purses because I’m a girl, but I narrowed it down to the two small purses and I didn’t even have my backpack or messenger bag and I checked them into a hotel where they should’ve let me in to a concert, but I’m OK I’m not gonna stalk people and harass them and be like you know I I always called the manager to ask him to let me back in, but I just left a message kind of sharing my experience for a moment to let them know that they didn’t really it didn’t go so well and because the guy on the phone had to answer my questions before and I just think I needed to plan more carefully in advance, so I’m not gonna be mad at that lady you know I can try to love what I don’t like about these people, but I’m not gonna like go as far to the extreme of like allowing people like Anthony Hopkins to get away with being deceitful enough to possibly murder, innocent people in his real life or to be deceptive to people in mine or my neighbors to try to pull the wool over my family’s eyes, and their dishonesty is not something that I have to ultimately love because they are my neighbors. I think I’m trying to learn what is it that God can do to try to help these people like what is it that he loves about them because I can’t find a reason to love their being deceiving and letting me be hurt as if bipolar girl that is not supposed to be happening then that have meat company, markets, and women that are bullies shouldn’t be allowed to get away with harming, innocent, bipolar girls just for advocating animal rights because it goes against their financial well-being, cause they’re worried that they’re not gonna make as much money if people don’t slaughter the animals so little by little gradually people have to learn that they should try to be kind to them. Animals have no rights so if I was probably gonna be anything professionally, I would’ve been like an animal rights lawyer and I don’t think that cows pigs and chickens and turkeys and lambs are given their fair share of kindness so I’m just gonna go wish you folks a good day and whenever you can possibly when you’re traveling on the road cheese plant based options at your local food establishments and if they don’t have them demand them, and if you have your own way to grow your own food and provide them for your family and other people that’s wonderful. It’s glorious maybe one day Peter will will get that memo and maybe he won’t become a predator to me. Maybe those men will leave me alone that we’re targeting me you know I can’t stay for sure what his motivation was for showing up at the Pharmacy cause he didn’t try to hurt me so he left there, but you know why probably cause he had such invasive cramping in his stomach from eating some bug naked barbecue sandwich en route one that he was gonna have to go back to the Econolodge or wherever the hell it is that he’s staying oh yeah that’s right. He lets the man that raped me drive his Subaru around that. He probably has another man’s name with an alias so that the man that reached me isn’t recognize the one that’s actually staying in that house because they cover one lie after the other and if they’re just about to get caught, they’ll change their name so that you can’t persecute them and so folks the records can be covered the evidence can be concealed or obscured so those who know the truth you know are rare but golden you know so there’s like a saying in Chinese Shaolin

“Those who know the truth are not so great as those who love the truth, and those who love the truth are not so great as those who live it!”

You know it just reminds me when I worked in Chinatown at the Concert Venue. I was around Chinese people who were like my family when I was a white girl at 17 years old I enrolled in acupuncture school when I was 20 but I had to withdrawal because I didn’t have enough money to pay that $2000 tuition out-of-pocket per month, but I was going to try but I had to pay my rent too and my phone bill so and my groceries as a go-go bar dancer so there’s no way I could do that. I’m scared of needles anyway so I choose to do acupuncture and Swedish massage therapy until I started to become a meditation teacher, for the flower of life Merkaba then went back to my Christian roots and tried to become a school teacher. My dad substance-abuse problems through a wrench in my plans to go to school, so I started focusing on music when I moved to Maine to get therapy and counseling for PTSD and bipolar depression and then I just got kicked out of a concert last night not actually let in through the door when I was bearing gifts. OK so that’s my testimony to you. I hope it’s helped you learn something new. Maybe to be less judgmental maybe to be a little bit less strict or rigid like you know have some flexibility when someone comes to your door and just like goodness steaks they could’ve just kept my freaking suitcase. It wasn’t a suitcase. They could’ve kept my backpack and same thing if I had just checked in and I couldn’t get to the hotel before the concert do you think they’re gonna turn someone away? I paid $125 if they had no weapons in their luggage if you’re a manager of a concert it’s like sure you can leave that here if it has no drugs or any bad things in it in the manager’s office in the Mercury in an empty freaking closet they could’ve put it anywhere in that building that it would’ve been safe away from where the concert was happening is all I’m saying the things that I have carried that I didn’t even try to bring in the last time. I said not to be so redundant but when I did what they asked me to do to come back there without my Messenger bag or backpack did they let me in through the door when I was smiling and happy with a nice friendly girl working at the door and then the manager came in that was not that young lady and then gave me some problems like I’m willing to forgive all of these people there last night and I know that I will, but I’m not going to go back there anytime soon to try to go to a concert. I can tell you that I’ll be better off staying at home since my lungs don’t get filled with secondhand smoke from the damn high Street crowd trying to get marijuana in their lungs that they’re 420 festivals or whatever the hell it is that they try to do OK so if it were not a psychotropic plan not to be judgmental of the Bahamian crowds, but that’s one way that the devil tries to do things so if you haven’t read the book that was published in the 1930s MOLECH of marijuana then I suggest you at least look at the cover of it and judge that book by it cause that’s one book you can’t judge by its cover don’t let yourself become so distracted and so polluted in your body chemistry with something that’s a substance that can cause your ability to discern to be weak and then other people take advantage of you or he might not be as smart as you could be if you weren’t smoking but by all means if you use hemp for milk or omega-3 six and nine as an oil or a milk or like a form of internal nourishment without smoking then it’s actually beneficial to have CBD but I’m not gonna go to that Concert Venue for a long time if ever again because I just don’t want to breathe in that smoked either I tried to avoid the long line I know, but I know that if I wanted to go back there, it might be possible. There are other ways to enjoy concert concerts virtually but it’s nice to be in person with people too and I still I don’t really necessarily regret going because I’m I was able to see some nice people and I’m just worried that my car that I was in the LYFT driver we would’ve been better off having Fred Flintstone bring me home. The car was falling apart, so try not to worry and have a panic attack I played. I think it’s called Tom Candy Run on my phone to try not to look at the road because I was trying not to have a panic attack in the backseat until I made it home safely but less than learned next time I’m going to a concert will be by a rental car and I guess I’ll have to check my bags somewhere before I arrive, but I’m not gonna apologize for the tour bus because if I want to talk to someone that’s in them, I’m going to if you don’t like it folks you can kiss my Lily white butt. To quote my mother nope you know I would’ve never gone backstage to meet Imogen Heap if it wasn’t for my you know doing things like that before so I’m gonna continue being who I am whether people like it or not so can’t please everyone no matter how nice you are because there are still people that want bad things to happen in a good people yeah so it’s spring time so happy spring. I think Earth Day has been like three days so let’s focus on making the Earth that our planet I’m so happy to actually see some green grass growing in my backyard where it has been covered with ice and snow for the past five months.

All right, have a wonderful happy spring and happy new year and also Nissan and ISAN the month that spring begins on the Jewish calendar is the name for the word April 4 month of the Latin calendar in the western calendar, but in Jewish terms, this is actually when the new year begins. I kind of feel like always that way that January isn’t actually when the new year it’s a little too premature cause that’s when winter time is that’s when you’re supposed to be resting and hibernating and refueling but then spring comes and everything’s like you open up the gates the bulls go out to the pasture they want to run they want to smell the flowers so you can’t keep a bowl behind a gate. It’s whole life and actually my name. APEURLIZ is the word for the bulls to the pasture, releasing them to the pasture and it reminds me of Ferdinand, but sometimes that is the Aries the bull but it’s the mail. No, that’s the Taurus which comes in May.🌸 so that is another way to describe the word April that the kind of way that I feel in my spirit sometimes when people try to barricade me anyway so the lion and the lamb I’m right just focus on having a happy new year and the passover is also when the sheep should not be brought to slaughter anymore because Jesus died on a cross for us to be reminded that we don’t have to slaughter those innocent lamps and we shouldn’t be slaughtered like they were because God said that’s not what is needed to go to heaven anymore. It is what is in your heart that matters as far as nourishment goes. He said we’d have the land of milk and honey and bread was the most secret of the offerings of the 12 tribes of Israel, so I suggest you make some sense since it’s a Sabbath and I gotta go practice what I appreciate tickets to the store and buy some because else I’m gonna have to make a a pancake to go with the mud pie ! OK everyone have a blessed day!

Blessings & Peace ,

April Joines

What ? What ? What ? What ? Thrift shop